A thought of thanks. A word of thanks, a gesture of thanks. All these I feel in this day. This is the angle I take. It's so great to be appreciated, and treated, and spoilt rotten. Like an endorsement of parenthood. I didn't have that with my first child, still don't. But with my second a daughter with spirit and ambition and a wife a friend and sometimes a combatant, I chose my course and steered my ship into uncharted waters as is the voyage of life.
This is another angle: It's just so good to relax into being a male a gifted spoilt male. They bought me a massage. A foot and back massage. I'd been thinking I might need this, since I have been training with weights and placing the bar too high on my back muscle when doing squats. That kind of heavy lifting thing that heroes do. (In my mind) The knots are still there, but smaller.
I had my legs massaged in brown sugar like a skin purge. Sweet sandpaper and the Balinese womans' hands so small like a child's. My legs so hairy and and male, I wondered what she thought with all the clients she must have. School boys feet, old mens feet, scarred and baby soft feet. I sat next to a European women in the foot massage room who was having her toenails done. I would love to get a pedicure one day. Its on the goals list. Why don't men do that?
Then I had my back massaged. She was a gentle woman and asked would I like it harder. I replied 'no it's fine' and thought. Yes its perfect as it is. Not invasive but a positive touch, and made me think of the respect for women thing that for me a man must have. She slowly kneaded my oiled back, and discovered the knots that had been so painful. I remember thinking that they were shrinking like little walnuts under my skin.
So what's the message in all of this? It's a giant thank you. It passed through my mind like a whisper followed by a thought. It's time to say thank you Julian. Just do that. So I did. She massaged a knot and I said thankyou. I said thank you to reception. I came home and said thank you to my wife for organising and to my daughter for instigating. Isn't thank you just the greatest thing you can do? A thank you to the people who celebrate you and all those involved in the myriad of small things that make those experiences real thank yous. It's gratitude acted on without it no-one knows.
Thank you. That feels awesome. Thank you.